Monthly Archives: May 2012

Where is David Bowie?

Where is David Bowie?

He’s vanished. The Thin White Duke’s 65th birthday was January 8, 2012, but there was no public party, no photographs, no nostalgia decorated with candles and frosting.

Unlike contemporaries Mick Jagger and Jimmy Page, Ziggy Stardust seems to have disappeared into a vast domestic void, ala John Lennon. Reliable news reports like Rolling Stone and the UK’s Daily Record allude to a former rock god who has now devoted himself, heart and soul, to the life of being a Dad and a husband. He is not out dancing, he is not out attending red carpet events, and he is not on the talk show circuit. He is just… missing.

I want my renegade back. Supposedly, there is a 12-city tour city scheduled the summer of 2012; with all activities and preparations sanctioned by doctors and heart specialists. Did you know that Bowie had a heart attack in 2004, and it has haunted him ever since? At age 57, our hero doubled over in agony and was diagnosed with heart problems. He has been awfully quiet ever since. His upcoming tour is brought to you by the best cardiac specialists money can buy….but is the world ready for Bowie’s newest incarnation of feeble monarch of the circadian rhythm? I don’t know.

Because Bowie is not a part of a group like similar rock gods as The Rolling Stones or The Who, he is not involved in the same financial group dynamics or bickering as those who are multi-invested in their own fame or royalty deals.  There is no simpering Axl Rose haunting the background of Bowie’s music awards. Being a singular phenomenon, Bowie is able to call the shots and remain the ultimate superstar in any grand touring production in which he participates. He can be as intimate or as obscure as he likes – but ultimately, his fans just want him to be visible.

Iman, little HSN Circe. You are a siren in the sea of muses – admit it. What have you done to the beloved one? You have reduced him to carpool, to painting pictures all afternoon and then picking up the spawn after school. It is unacceptable how you have tamed the musical demon. I would respect you, if only I wasn’t so annoyed that it was Bowie that you silenced.

65 years old and hidden… inaccessible… will the 2012 tour redeem you? Or will it be a puppet show, driven by ticket sales and merchandising rights? I mean, after all – no matter how much I adore your previous personas, nothing can excuse the concert sellout of the “Serious Moonlight Tour” and the absurd “Glass Spider Tour”.  I’m speaking from genuine truth – this is from a fan who had the poster of your “Elephant Man” Chicago run taped to the wall by my bed. I only want the best for you.

At least you have not fallen prey to the church of plastic surgery. Bowie still looks like Bowie, even with the heavy bags under his blue and brown eyes.

We miss you, David. You haven’t been onstage since 2006, and you’ve only done cameos on other people’s projects. Please come back to the world that worships and adores you.

David, Ziggy, Aladdin Sane. Where art thou?

“Oh, how I sighed, when they asked if I knew his name…”

Andromeda Eve joins Pinterest – and kinda likes it

Thanks to an old high school friend, I got an invite to Pinterest.

Previously, I had not bothered with the site because it didn’t make sense to me. Screen capture a bunch of pictures and “pin” them into a online folder? Hmmm…

I became more interested in Pinterest when I was on the Examiner message boards and people were talking about how useful the site was as a social medium. So, like a good little Social Media denizen, I set up a profile and created six new Pinterest boards in subjects that I think I can keep updated and meaningful.

My current boards are:

  • Princess Diana (of course)
  • Big Bang Theory
  • Famous Author Interviews (to throw my Examiner columns into)
  • Books Worth Reading (I can put Dark Continents books and other favorites here)
  • Haunting Women
  • Amazing Libraries

I had a good time filling the boards with pictures, and even found myself saying “ooh” and “ahh” looking at other people’s boards. There are some stunning photographers out there, capturing images of clothes that are more like artwork then functional coverings for stick-thin models, powerful close-ups of flowers and insects, and pictures of place on earth that are so breath taking, they cannot possibly be real.

Find me on Pinterest at http://pinterest.com/andromedaeve/, but just remember that like all things that I do, it is a work in progress.

How an entire generation was brain-washed by Little House on the Prairie

When I was a second grader back in the 1970’s, I read and re-read the Little House on the PrairieSeries by Laura Ingalls Wilder. It sparked my imagination, and made me wish that I was a little pioneer girl just like her.  I couldn’t decide who I was more aligned with – Laura Ingalls or Jo March, from Little Women. In the end, they were both wonderful books with beloved female characters.

Fast forward to the TV show, also titled “Little House on the Prairie”. This dramatic soap opera of a series ran from 1974- 1982, and featured Melissa Gilbert as Laura, Michael Landon as Pa, Karen Grassle as Ma, and Melissa Sue Anderson as Mary. Obligatory twin sisters Lindsay and Sidney Greenbush played Carrie, and a variety of other cast members portrayed the roles of Nellie Olson, Mr. Edwards, and Reverend Alden. The show was sticky sweet, and every week seemed to bring a new calamity to the town of Walnut Grove.

As an impressionable 8 year old, I loved this show. It was always broadcast on Monday night, and it seemed like fine entertainment at the time. So when I was channel surfing recently, I was thrilled to find Laura and the whole Ingalls gang in syndication on one of the cable channels. And that, my friends, is when the realization finally dawned on me…

Wait – am I about to be sacrilegious and diss one of the Hallmark Channel’s favorite primetime re-runs? I’m not sure how controversial what I am about to say may be to some – but I have got to be honest. With age comes wisdom, as they say.

Here goes: “Little House on the Prairie” was a crappy, sappy TV show.

I mean, a real stinker; on the same level of painful TV viewing as “Three’s Company“, “The Love Boat“, and “Welcome Back Kotter.”

Did you know that there are more than 5 websites that list, one after another, every episode of every season of the show? As I glance through all eight seasons of illnesses, injuries, love affairs, deaths, and neighborly angst, I remember most of them. And all of that sermonizing they did! I think I spent more time in the Walnut Grove church-slash-school building then I did at CCD class preparing for my first communion.

It took years before I grew tired of Laura’s buck-toothed tears, or Nellie’s corkscrew curls. I kept hoping Mary wouldn’t lose her sight, or that Caroline would finally give birth to that baby boy that Charles was always yammering about. Even through the Michael Landon Kodak years and that odd season when they all lived in the town of Winoka and adopted weak-chinned Albert , I stuck with the Ingalls family. I was brainwashed into watching that show every week until I was in middle school, when I finally let the Force Be With Me and fell in love with Starbuck (Dirk Benedict’s original Starbuck, thank you very much).

By the early 1980’s, the whole story arc of the series was centered around Nellie marrying a Jewish guy, Laura finally meeting that goofy looking Almanzo, Grace arrives, and Mary is still blind. Through it all, Pa still manages to spend at least one or two episodes every season saving someone from dying or preaching some more of those Mike Brady/Andy Griffith words of wisdom. The whole show finally jumped the shark in Season 6 when the School for the Blind burns down and Mary’s baby dies. I still remember watching that particular episode with my mother, and the way we looked at each other and rolled our eyes over all the melodrama. It was just too much. Enter puberty- and my Little House on the Prairie watching days were over.

I didn’t pay much attention to the last, straggling seasons as the series wound down. Laura spent a lot of time worrying that Almanzo, with that fabulous bowl haircut, was cheating on her. Charles and Caroline find some more children to adopt, Charles saves the lives of some more really depressed (and depressing) people, there is a lot of Christianity-talk, and Mary is still blind. Apparently, Walnut Grove was a hotbed of crime and disease in the late 1880’s, since so many episodes seem to revolve around death and hostage-taking. Who knew?

Whatever. Back to my original intent for writing this blog in the first place – I just cannot believe how unwatchable the shows are to me now. My forty-four year old self just sits with my mouth open, unable to endure all that saccharine and bad luck. The show was canceled in 1982, preparing the way for Michael Landon to pursue additional religious-themed TV shows, a divorce scandal, and coffee enemas. Melissa Gilbert got a nose job, but that was about the only job she ever got after the show ended.

There were a few, final movies to wrap up the loose ends, all of them sporadically starring the original cast. In the last of these post-series movies, the citizens of Walnut Grove band together to blow up their town in order to keep a railroad tycoon from taking control. Seems to me, they could have done that a lot earlier in the series, and saved a generation from whole lot of pioneer headaches and heartaches.

 

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